Send your questions to Terrance: firstname.lastname@example.org
Dear Gay Best Friend,
So, I’m a 22-year old female maybe that would help somewhere along this but I’m going to jump right into it. I have 2 men which are both my boyfriends. One is locked up and has been for a couple years now and I have been there for everything court dates, visits every week, commissary all of that. Then I have another guy I met him at work we hit it off once we laid eyes on each other and have been together since (that’s a year). My problem is the dude that’s locked up is going to be coming home within the next few months and I’m scared because I don’t know who to let go of. Surely I have to let go of 1 of them but I love both of them truly. I KNOW I shouldn’t have got myself into something like this but I am sooo HELP! – Which One To Choose
P.S. I just started reading your blogs like a week ago honey and I LOVE them. You keep it real and give it to them straight so where else to get better advice than from a gay man ; ) OK!
Dear Ms. Which One To Choose,
But, wait, this just in …. Breaking News: Your man that is locked up, well, boo boo, that is not your man. How the hell you claim to be in a relationship with a man who is in prison for a couple of years? I swear the dumb gene is swirling around in the water and you young chicks are swallowing it up by the gallons.
I am going to say this, and leave it alone. Why do you ghetto hood rat chicks keep claiming to be in relationships with a man in prison and he’s been gone for years? Y’all are some dumb ass broads. If he is locked up then let that man do his time, alone! You can’t do his time with him. That –ish isn’t fair to you. So, he expects for you to be faithful to him while he is locked up for lawd knows how long, and then when he gets out he is running the streets with his boys drinking, smoking, and getting it in with every chick he comes across, and then you get mad because he isn’t there for you like you were when he was locked up. And, of course the other chicks get pregnant, he still can’t find a job, and guess what, your man gets locked up again because he is doing the same stupid –ish he was doing before that got him locked up. SMDH!
And, Ms. Honey, what makes you think your man has been faithful to you since he’s been locked up? Uhm, have you thought about that, blondie? I swear y’all women with these prison men wear me so thin. If a man has been locked up for years in prison with other men, and no women, and if he is sexually repressed what do you think he is going to do? This is a good question for you isn’t it project Weaves-R-Us? I’m going to do a quick run to the projects in your neighborhood and do a survey while you try to figure this one out. And, by the way, I want you to Google this term also while I’m out in the projects. The term is called, Gay For Stay.
I can’t do this with you today, Ms. Which One To Choose. Oh, to be young, dumb, and full of nothing. There is literally nothing in your head. Please get back in school, educate yourself, move out of the hood, stop socializing with low brow people because they will keep you down, surround yourself around positive people, dump the guy in prison because there is no future with him, continue dating the guy at your job, which I totally disagree with, but because you are fast and won’t slow down you won’t listen to me anyway. And, here’s a tip of why you shouldn’t date someone where you work, “You never sh*t where you eat.” Even dogs won’t sleep or eat where they sh*t. So, grow up, and sweetie, you’re not in love, you are in lust. Where are your parents? Girl, never mind. Don’t answer that. Please get your life together and stop playing wifey when you are just a little girl. These men don’t love you or want to marry you, not right now. Get yourself together and I mean that with all the project hood love that I can muster, and girl, that ain’t much. – Straight From Your Gay Best Friend
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Make sure to get your copy of my new book, STRAIGHT FROM YOUR GAY BEST FRIEND – The Straight Up Truth About Relationships, Work, and Having A Fabulous Life (Agate/Bolden – October 2010; $15). It is available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, HERE!