We have all heard the sayings “absence makes the heart grow fonder” or, “you can have too much of a good thing” right? Well whoever coined these terms obviously wasn’t in a long-distance relationship. Or they were just so completely annoying that their loved ones really didn’t want to spend too much time with them.
Don’t believe the hype: long distance relationships suck. They suck worse than going back to work after a vacation. They suck worse than parking tickets. They suck worse than a thunderstorm on your wedding day, minimum wage, missing out on a promotion to the lazy guy who always seems to wear stained shirts to work, burning your tongue on scalding coffee, finding out you have no shampoo when you’re already in the shower and your hair is already wet. I could go on, but you get the idea. Long-distance relationships suck.
A quick Google search for articles about long-distance relationships unveiled countless articles about how to make long-distance relationships work, and many were all about how great it can be to be in a long-distance relationship. Not many of them focused on the little things that most people (read me) overlook which make long-distance relationships really hard.
Here are 7 things that people don’t think about that make being in a long-distance relationship really damn hard…
The awkward apologetic half smile people give you when you tell them your relationship status.
It’s as though they’re thinking ‘oh what an idiot, she has no idea what’s going on behind her back’. You might not think that trying to start a long-distance relationship isn’t a very good idea, but seriously, don’t treat me like I’m a complete fool.
The assumption of everyone else that he/she will cheat on you.
‘Why don’t you just break up, he’s going to cheat on you anyway’. Yeah, thanks a bunch, that’s what I want to hear.
People telling you that it is bound to fail.
People have so many horror stories about their own or their next-door neighbor’s brother’s experiences with long-distance relationships, that they feel the need to share with you. Why? How does that help any? All that does is turn me into a paranoid crazed fool.
Seeing happy couples everywhere you go.
I’m probably a little bit biased, and sick to death of love with all the Valentine’s Day stuff I’ve seen this week, but when you’re hundreds or thousands of miles away from each other, seeing happy couples everywhere you go, is really crap. Today I had to fight the urge to either slap, or sit between a loved-up couple on the subway, just so they would stop molesting each other. Because, apparently, they were doing it just to offend me.
Being the third wheel.
The one thing that people would tell me all the time before I was in a long-distance relationship was that it meant I would have plenty of time to go out with my friends. And it does. However, if your ladies have partners, it means that you will end up being the third wheel, or fifth wheel, maybe even seventh wheel. Normally it doesn’t bother me, and going out with friends trumps moping at home alone anyway, but after a while it can get you down.
The time difference.
I always thought being in a long-distance relationship was no big deal, you can just talk on the phone or on the internet instead of seeing each other in person. Sadly, I forgot about the time differences. When you’re in America, and he is in New Zealand, it becomes a bit more difficult to talk all the time, because there are only so many days when I can go to work bleary eyed after being on Skype at 4am. Weekends, when neither of you have to be at work can sadly become almost the only time when you can speak to each other. Which brings me to my next point…
The high cost of international phone calls.
Much like the time difference dilemma, I forgot about international call costs. When normally I would text message throughout the day, even just random useless facts, with long-distance relationships, you can’t always do that, which makes the distance seem much father. It is cheaper, and less likely to induce a heart attack, to fly halfway across the world than it is to shell out for a phone bill which is lettered with international call costs. Sigh.
However, as basically every single article ever written on the subject will attest, I do believe that it will all be worth it in the end. And frankly, if you think otherwise, please don’t feel the need to tell me so at every opportunity.