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by LJ Knight of bitchielife.com


The power struggle between men and women is one that is ongoing and never-ending. Both genders come into dating with their own agendas, and this is where the miscommunication starts. Agendas may shift if the individuals involved become enamored with one another. But, from their first interaction, there is always a plan of action.

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The plan of action is to achieve power over the other person and get them to lean towards their goal. Some have no intentions on abusing the power. They only want their fair share and are willing to share. Others come into the game knowing what they want from the other person and are willing to manipulate to achieve their final goal; even if it means hurting the other person.

The power shift between men and women goes as follows: In the beginning the woman is the one with the power and the man willingly gives it to her. Why? Because she has something he wants. He wants to have sex with her. His plan may shift later after he gets to know her. Then he may want to have a committed relationship.  But, initially, his primary goal was to stringently pursue his plan of action: The panties. On the contrary, women go into their dealings with men with their own set of priorities. In order of hierarchy, her plan of action goes as follows: She wants his love, affection, loyalty, and sex. Notice the priority difference? Meanwhile, he is not the least bit alarmed by her having the power. In fact, he prefers it, because the power that she has is what is going to make her comfortable. This temporary power she feels is what is going to cause her to let her guard down and let the man pursuing her in. You can take that in more than one, by the way.

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Eventually, the woman gives in to the desires of the man. By this point, she may also have the same strong desires, but she never once loses sight of her original plan of action. She still wants a relationship with him but she loses all of her good damn sense and makes his plan a priority over hers. So, she gives up her honey pot and hopes for the best. Now, there could be two outcomes from this. One is that their intimacy could lead the man to become more attached to the woman. That is if he already had a foundation of emotion toward her. He had to already be into her to some extent for this to happen. The second and less desirable outcome by women is that the man chunks the deuces at her.

Show of hands if you have experienced the following scenario at least once in your life, ladies:You are dating a guy, and he is perfect. He does everything for you; seems so attentive and nice. The moment you give him the honey pot his personality and demeanor toward you changes. That is because there has been a power shift.  Women can literally feel the power being drained from them the moment the man climaxes.  Suddenly, he is in his he-man stance.  He becomes less attentive and less friendly. He never wants to go out of his way for you; when before making you happy was his pleasure.  He might not want to spend as much time with you or make you a priority. That is because he realizes he now possesses the power; he has conquered you sexually. And, if he is a jerk, who only wanted that to begin with, then as a result, he will become less interested in you.

Meanwhile, the woman suddenly feels bamboozled. “What happen?  Why is he acting this way?” The moment her goal and needs were placed second to his, she gave him her power. Deep down she knows this and so does he. This is why he now can behave like a jack ass with less fear. You have been conquered. The woman may then feel a range of emotions from anger, to feeling played to emotional abandonment.

Sex is more than just an act for some women. For some women, every instance of sex is always an emotional experience to be cherished. The idea that this man is now showing his true colors becomes too much for them to handle; even if the circumstance never called for her to become emotional about the sex or the man never gave signs that he was going to be emotionally available to her.

The moral of this story, ladies, is never to give up that juicy spot until you feel that you are getting what you truly desire from the guy. If it is a committed relationship you desire from him, don’t have sex until you feel secure enough to do so. This way you will not feel emotionally trumped. Also, if you know that you are not one of those chicks who can separate having commitment-free sex from having a deep-rooted emotional bond with a man, don’t have sex until you feel you have that.

Fellas, if you have absolutely no intentions of being monogamous with the woman and know that you are only in it for the panties, be direct about your needs. Not all women want to be in a relationship with you. Some want what’s between your legs just as bad as you want what’s between theirs.  Approaching women with honesty about your intentions could be what prevents your tires from being slashed or car windows busted out because you two had a sexual miscommunication.

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