In this roundtable discussion, Morris Chestnut, KEM, Raheem Devaughn, Keith Washington, TV personality Evrod Cassimy and radio personality Big Greg share their most intimate thoughts men have surrounding relationships and women at Radio One Detroit’s Women’s Empowerment Expo.
The discussion moderated by CoCo of 105.9 Kiss morning show, Mason & CoCo in the Morning, reveals what black men think about many topics women tend to stress about. The fellas also revealed things that they find attractive in women as well as how you can get your man to step up and do what you feel he should be doing!
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What do you think empowers a woman?
KEM: “I think that… what empowers a woman, first and foremost, is her ability to love… What empowers a woman most of all is not just her ability to love others but her ability to love herself.”
Raheem Devaughn: “Self Confidence. A confident woman.”
Keith Washington: “Having some type of spirituality in your life. Also, I think James Brown said it best. It’s a man’s world but it aint a damn thing without a woman’s touch.”
Big Greg: “… A woman who knows how to raise kings and queens for the world.”
Evrod Cassimy: “Confidence is the biggest thing for me…”
Morris Chestnut: “One of the things I believe in is, taking control over your life. Take control of your life so you don’t have to depend on any man. That is first and foremost.”
What is an ideal date? What should a woman expect when setting her standards?
Morris Chestnut: “One thing that I always like women to understand is, you guys truly have the power because most of the things men do is to attract a woman. So as long as you guys realize that you have to demand respect. You have to let that man know you demand respect. If he don’t open the door for you, just sit there outside the car and wait for him to come around and open the door for you. You know, don’t pick up the bill, let him pick up the bill. Just demand respect.”
Big Greg: “My ideal date… My wife is going to love this. This what I would do buy her a dress, lay it out on the bed for her. Tell her I want you to put this on and be ready by at least 7 o’clock because we know it’s going to be about 8 o’clock before she gets ready. Take her out to dinner to one of her favorite restaurants, and let her choose what she want to do for the rest of the night.”
How do you feel about older women who date younger men?
KEM: “I don’t have a problem with it… If it’s right it’s right. I ain’t got no problem with it.”
Raheem Devaughn: “I am like… I am like Andre 3000, I feel like they know what they want out of life. You know… Older women seem to be more mature… They have experienced the trial and error of life and yeah… I am all for it.”
Keith Washington: “I don’t have a problem with it either. It’s just with the older brothers you gotta put in that extra work. Appreciate that woman ‘cuz these young guys is doing a heck of a job. Whatever they are doing. And there is nothing wrong with it so keep doing what you do.”
To a woman that is raising a daughter in 2014, a teenage daughter, what information do you think is valuable to be sharing with her daughter?
Morris Chestnut: “That is an excellent question. I have a daughter who is fifteen years old right now… I tell her just to demand respect from people and to have self confidence and love yourself because it starts with an individual. Don’t rely on someone else to make you feel good about yourself. That is what I tell my daughter all the time. Know yourself.”
Evrod Cassimy: “…Your body is a temple.”
Big Greg, pointing to Evrod: “He took the words right outta my mouth!”
What makes a woman beautiful, one thing that when you see a women it just pulls you in?
KEM: Stumbling over words with a big smile on his face, “Just one thing… I think you know what… We say… We always say… we always talk about the physical appearance of a person and how we find the person physically attractive. And that is the first thing that you see. Before you even get to what your personality is like, the first thing you see is her appearance. They way that she is dressed. The way that she takes care of her hair. The way that she carries herself. Her smile. Her eyes. Is she flirting with me a little bit.” CoCo begins to lower her glasses and bat her lashes at KEM. He proceeds, “That don’t hurt. (smiles) I am just saying. I am just saying.” KEM then proceeds to kick Keith Washington out of his chair in attempts to sit next to CoCo.
The group begins to talk about the importance of having and attending events like Radio One Detroit’s Women’s Empowerment Expo. During this chat Keith Washington, Morris Chestnut, Evrod Cassimy and Big Greg make some pretty bold statements on why women need to come together.
The artist on the panel were also asked to pick one song, other than their own, to describe who they are as black men. Big Greg, Evrod Cassimy and Morris Chestnut also weigh in. Morris even found himself perplexed at one point and throws a challenge to KEM to throw the attention off of himself.
The men close the conversation revealing one statement they have on behalf of all men to women.
Morris Chestnut: “… It’s all about you. It’s all about the woman. Everything a man does is for women or money. So you have to understand that. Own that power… Have self respect and own that power.”
Evrod Cassimy: “I would say, you are beautiful… It doesn’t matter what you see on TV, it doesn’t matter what you see in the magazines, every single one of you in here is beautiful and there is nothing that you can’t do.”
Big Greg: “Ladies I got to say, love yourselves and love each other as sisters. Please!”
Keith Washington: “First of all, stay in power and in order to claim it you gotta own it. Stay in control… Walk out of here with control. You are the woman in power.”
Raheem Devaughn: “I would say own the queen in you. You posses a fairamone, you posses an energy. Wether you are sixteen or seventy-five, a petite size or plus size, you are beautiful. Wether you wear your hair in dreads or short, or you wear a perm, or your light skin, chocolate, butter pecan, whatever you are, you posses a beauty and a power… and you know it’s a connection we feel with God… We all take our rights of passage here through a woman to get here. It’s the rights of passage… Own the queen in you.”
KEM: “I have two daughters so I have learned how really important it is for a man to be involved in the lives of his daughters… What I try to tell them is you don’t need a man to feel alright about you. I want them to know that God loves them and I want you to know (pointing to the audience) that God loves you. That he has a plan for your life. That your latter days will be greater than your former days…”
Watch the video below to see how it all goes down!