• Could A Man’s Single Friend Have A Negative Effect On A Committed Relationship?

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    woman at a partyA couple long weekends ago I found myself in the house of my lover’s best friend with a co-ed gathering. The conversation was dominated by the usual topic of sports, which artist has the dopest flow finished off with talks of their high school glory days. A sometime-ish sports enthusiast and as one who did not attend the same high school as the rest of the crew, I would tap in and out of the conversation. Half way through I noticed that I was the only female representative engaged in conversation I attempted to reel the other sister in and introduce more gender neutral topics to the flow.

    She stayed uninterested and away from the group. I was puzzled, a seemingly pleasant personality, she had not been introduced and was even disregarded the entire evening. I was even more perplexed because I could not tell what her relationship was to any of my man’s friends.

    At the end of the evening as we began to leave it became clear what her purpose was, as she made her way to the bedroom with the friend and closed the door.

    Trademark characteristic of this friend had me chuckling. See, to describe this friend you have to take a step back into time and bring up Jay-z’s “Big Pimpin:

    “He Y’all be frontin’/ Me give my heart to a woman/Not for nothin’ never happen’/I’ll be forever mackin’”

    I usually mess with his head by bringing up relationships and love, because that’s what I do. For I know that the pimpin mentality is usually a phase some men go through in order to grow. But I respect the fact that he doesn’t lie to any of the females on the roster, I mean really- I can’t hate the player but I do hate the game.

    But I often think, with my lover and his best friend having such opposing views on women, love and dating does the single man quest, appeal to and even influence the decisions of a man who is in a relationship? When the single friend wants to go out gallivanting and the coupled friend wants to go home, does this create conflict in the committed man’s relationship?

    Ladies have you or do you currently have an issue with your man’s single best friend or are the type of friends a man has a non-factor?

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    About the author: Telisha Ng is a freelance writer and author of the Goddess Intellect blog from Toronto, Canada. Connect with her on twitter @goddess_I  or send her an email contact@goddessintellect.com.

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