After every relationship there should be certain lessons that you learned and a level of growth that you achieve after wards. Some people come into your life in order for you to learn and or grow but not necessarily for them to be a permanent fixture in your life. Here are a few questions that you should ask yourself after a break up and consider before you enter into a new relationship. Be sure to answer these questions honestly or it defeats the purpose.
What did you learn?
This is an important question that you should ask yourself. Knowing what you learned after a break up is important in your growth process. Overall after the end of every relationship there should be something that you learned or some form of growth that you developed from the experience. Some learn that they can never be with an emotionally unavailable person, or someone who has kids, etc.. This learning experience is unique for every individual.
What qualities about your last partner did you like versus the ones you disliked?
Not everything about the relationship or the other person was horrible despite the fact that you two are now apart. This is the time where you should decide the qualities that you liked about the person versus the ones you disliked. Some of the more likable qualities you may want your next partner to also possess. While there may be some that you wish to never deal with again.
What are qualities that are a necessity for your next partner to possess?
There may have been some qualities that your last partner did not possess but that you now find necessary in your next partner. Decide what qualities and characteristics are the most important to you. What you can do without and what you simply refuse to be without. There may be some which are a necessity versus some qualities that are negotiable.
What mistakes do you feel you made?
In every experience there are always things that you wish you could do differently after it occurs. Use this time to decide for yourself what mistake you may have made in your past relationship that may have led to the demise of the relationship or that you simply never want to do again. Everyone plays a role.
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